Screen names~
Remember this is your first impression, so names like "cock4u" and "ragingbull" may seem funny when you're hanging out with your buddies, but aren't likely to draw the woman you're looking for.
The same can be said for "sexualdeviant" "mustangman" or "come2daddy"
Pictures~
Men - here's a tip, women do not want to see pictures of you with your arm around some woman that you've tried to crop out of the picture.
Skip the pictures of you standing next to your favorite souped up or restored car~
Leave the pic. with no shirt for some other time - even if you're in good shape - most women would rather discover the six pack after you've shared some conversation~
I know some women will disagree with me, but I think it shows greater character to hide a great body than it does to show it off the first chance you get~
This is especially true if you are more than a few pounds overweight and you are in your underwear
Chainmail or Renaissance costumes - OUT
('nuff said)
I'll save the content of profiles for another time, but I will say just one more thing - SPELL CHECK!
9 comments:
Julie,
Oh boy did I fall into a picture trap when I first went on okcupid.
You know how they have that little box that you drag around your face to create a thumbnail pic? Well I thought it was a cropping tool and I thought it had cropped my whore of an ex girlfriend right out of the picture. Much the way I cropped her out of my apartment and my life. But I digress...
Guys...no pics of the ex. Hell, don't put a pic of you and ANYONE...you're selling YOU not you and a friend.
Let me also add another tip since I feel my online dating profile has been fairly well received. Be yourself. If you are a complete jackass and play video games all day and have no job....POST THAT. One of two things could happen. Number one would be that you don't find anyone that wants to date a video game junkie that is unemployed and that is probably going to be the more likely situation. But number two is a dream come true as you might actually meet a video game junkie THAT HAS MILLIONS and is looking for a stay at home type of guy that wants to game into the night with her.
Honesty will get you someone that likes you for you. If you say that you are an avid kayaker that lives for the outdoors and it turns out that you get out of the house maybe twice a year....the chick is going to dump you.
Another tip...keep reading Julie's blog. She's gonna give you the inside scoop on women in the online world and when you finally make that dive into online dating you will be all the wiser!
Great stuff, Julie . I love your direct perspective with the sassy humor mixed in in this post and your Datekrispy entry from 5/3. Congrats on your entries to the Urban Dictionary!
Devin -
Thanks for the love! Funny thing, one of my alter egos is "Sassywahine" - you seem to have picked up on the sassy part. The other word is hawaiian for "surfer girl".
Fitz~
What's to say? You make me laugh~ From the day I saw your crazy profile on OKC I've been drawn to figuring out who that crazy guy was. I'm lucky enough to find out a little bit more on your blog each day~
Guys, what Fitz at Toilet Scribble says is true - be yourself - he captures it completely! He's blogged about his profile - visit his blog to read about it. It's a funny and obnoxious profile with touches of reality thrown in. Despite the tongue-in-cheek nature of it - it grabbed my attention, and apparently the attention of some other women.
Here's the deal - I'm not looking for a guy who is uber serious all of the time. Despite my exterior presentation, I have an obnoxious and sometimes crude sense of humor myself. Most people who have met me say that all of their preconceived ideas about who I would be had to be tossed out of the window once they met me. So, yes, I was taken in by a profile that showed some of that same ability to appreciate and highlight the irony in life.
Ok, enough of the Fitz and Julie mutual admiration club.
I do want to mention that both of the pictures in this blog entry are from actual dating profiles - hard to believe, but it's true.
Also, I just saw another screen name that I just had to share - "urfutureex" - how stupid is that????
All of the above goes the same for women. I've lost count of the amount of profiles of single women I've seen on okcupid (and others) where the woman is pictured with some guy or other (in one profile in particular, she was with a different guy in all 5 of her profile photos). Putting pictures of your children (this is for both men and women), beggars belief. Kids might be the center of your universe (the universal you, not the specific), but sticking photos of your sticky brats in your profile pictures isn't really such a great idea.
Hot Damn - yeah! Cheezewhiz - I hope you'll stop by again and offer your perspective on women and cyber dating - I'm a little out of the loop~
Funny ... in 15 years of online dating) that is not a typo) ... I can honestly say that I am glad I met 90 percent of the women I've met.
And the one thing they have had in common is that 90 percent of the guys they have met have been losers, or worse.
Reality, or just different expectations?
Jeff~
Fifteen years? Either you have the worst luck of anyone I've ever heard of or you thrive on variety!
Liking 90% of the women you've met are pretty good odds! If only everyone were as lucky!
You may be missing the point on the armor or the costume pictures... If someone has a hobby that eats as much time and money as a reenactment group does, putting up a picture like that serves as a filter and a warning.
Why should he or women spend time only to find out that the hobby is an issue later?
Wrenn - I think you may be missing the point~ people who participate in reinactment groups are an infiinitismally small minority of the population and that activity is probably not somethng that is high on a woman's list of desireable characteristics for a potential partner.
Therefore, it is something that should be the very first way you introduce yourself or your personality. You might want to consider showing that you have a more "rounded" personality but including in your write-up that you do devote quite a bit of time to that particular hobby.
By having pictures posted of this hobby it gives the impression of a man who has never grown out of playing D&D with his buddies in Jr. High. To most women, this signals an certain level of immaturity and need to escape reality. Again, not very desireable characteristics.
Finally, consider this, how important is this hobby? Would you rather have a woman and cut back on the hobby just a smidge? If not, are you really looking for someone to date or just someone to be available when you have a few moments of extra time to squeeze her in?
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