Buck Fuddies~

So what's a girl to do when the right guy just isn't coming along?

I've met a number of guys out there who would be great dating/partner material. For one reason or another, they just aren't available. Whether they're still not over their last relationship or marriage, whether they're not looking for anything long-term, whether there is just a significant age difference - something is not aligned and we don't match up in what we're looking for.

At the same time, we have a lot in common, enjoy one another's company, and feel physical chemistry.

So, what's a girl to do?

I get calls from these guys from time to time, wondering if I'd like to spend time together. They aren't suggesting dinner and a movie. What they want to do is to come over, chat a little and then hop into bed.

Admittedly, from time to time, I am in the same mood and I've accepted the offer.



Here's the rub, it just plain stinks to have them get up and leave and to wake up alone. I feel worse the next day than if I had spent the night before alone. For me, a physical connection is so much more intense if the person I'm with is someone I can build an emotional connection with as well as a physical connection.

I know what I'm looking for - I just don't have it available to me right now.

More and more lately, I'm turning down the offer when I get those calls. It's a costs/benefits thing - the benefits are fun, but they are so short lived! The cost of feeling more lonely afterwards just isn't worth it as much. I wonder if I"m alone in this. The fantasy of casual sex is so much more fun when it's just a fantasy. The reality is a little empty.